What Does the Power of Pause Mean?
The power of pause refers to slowing down, pausing, or intentionally stopping. The aim is to reflect, gain clarity, and focus before reacting or making a decision. I support individuals who struggle to slow down and pause. They share being busy with work and social engagements and thus describe themselves as always on the go. In counseling, I work with these individuals to identify moments in their day where they could slow down. For example, when they walk their dog or wash the dishes. I encourage clients to focus on what feelings surface when they slow down and where they feel these feelings in their bodies.
Pausing as Self-Care
Incorporating pausing as self-care can help you create intentional moments of rest and reflection. Sometimes, clients share needing or wanting to stay busy as they fear that when they are not busy, thoughts and feelings come to the surface. This, for some, is overwhelming; thus, clients share avoiding this. However, practicing pausing can help you take a step back and look internally. It lets you focus on your thoughts and feelings and become attuned to your needs or wants. Sometimes, clients feel stuck and share how a relationship with a loved one impacts them or how they feel at work. I work with these individuals to identify what’s in their control, for example, how they feel, what they think, and what is outside their control.
Practical Examples of Incorporating Pauses Into Daily Life
- Practice mindfulness
Sometimes, clients struggle to stop, or they physically stop, but their minds continue to overthink. These clients have tried meditation, but they find that they are unable to sit still for long enough to focus on their breath. Thus, I suggest practicing mindfulness, which can include walking or eating a meal mindfully. In counselling, we explore techniques such as focusing on your five senses to help you stay present in the moment. Another suggestion I shared with clients is to focus on their breath and notice what sensations come up. I incorporate mindfulness techniques from Dialectical Behavioural Therapy to support clients.
- Body scan
Some clients find it helpful to take a moment before they head out to work or the gym to do a body scan. A body scan is a check-in with what is going on inside. Taking the time to pause and sit with any sensations, aches, or pain enables you to address them before you start your day. I support clients who do not have enough time to pause in the morning, and I suggest doing a body scan as they are getting ready for their day. You can also incorporate your body scan into your morning stretching or breathing exercises.
- Practice gratitude
As you start your day and head to work or school, pause to think about things that are going well and that you are grateful for. Reflecting on tasks you completed or experiences you are grateful for can help shift your perspective and attitude for the rest of your day. Some of my clients share worries about a task they need to complete in the future, and feel stressed. They are not able to relax or switch off their mind. In counselling, I explore all the steps they have completed and identify what is in their control. This helps clients reflect on how far they have come and what they have achieved.
- Practice pausing at work
I support clients who struggle to take a break at work. These individuals do not take a lunch break and sometimes forget to take a bio break. They explained they wanted to complete one last task and reply to another email. In counselling, we explore what prevents them from taking a break and looking after themselves. For some of these individuals, they minimise their needs, and for others, they have normalised not taking a break. I work with them, and together, we focus on shifting some of their thoughts so they can meet their needs and take a break.
- Practice pausing screen time
I support clients who have multiple cell phones or laptops and struggle to put their devices down. Some clients share a need to respond to work emails within specific timeframes, and others share being on their cell phones to stay connected to loved ones overseas and in a different time zone. In counselling, we explore being present without being on a device. This helps individuals strengthen connections with their partners or friends in the present moment. It also helps them take a break from work, social media, and other online activities such as gaming or shopping.
The Benefits of Practicing Pause
- Reduce anxiety
Many of the clients I support share feelings of anxiety. Practicing pausing can help reduce these feelings by allowing individuals to focus on their nervous system and body sensations. Pausing and taking a few deep breaths, for example, helps the mind focus on something it can control and does regularly without thinking. People who feel anxious often think about the past or the future instead of the present. Also, people feel anxious about experiences or interactions they do not control. Taking a pause, reflecting on what you control, and becoming attuned to what is happening inside shifts your focus. It also allows you to focus on something you control.
- Reduce stress
Sometimes, clients share feelings of stress due to work, their relationships, or life in general. Taking a moment and pausing can help reduce these feelings by allowing individuals to focus on what is happening inside. For example, individuals struggle to eat, sleep, or stay focused when stressed. A pause can help you focus on attending to your needs, which will shift and reduce your feelings of being stressed. Meeting basic needs becomes less of a priority for some people when stressed. Some clients believe finishing the task will help them feel less stressed, but this is often untrue.
- Interrupt automatic reactions
In counselling, clients often share that they react without thinking or having all the facts, and then they feel bad about their reactions. Taking a moment and pausing before sharing your thoughts or opinions enables you to respond rather than react. It helps you focus and notice what happens inside of you. For example, some clients share feelings of frustration, and thus, they react in a situation. A pause can help these individuals be curious about how they feel and attend to this before they interact with others. Some individuals may feel comfortable sharing their feelings and engaging in a conversation to unpack this. This lands differently to someone reacting.
- Improve decision-making
Taking a pause can also help you make informed decisions, as you would have reflected on different perspectives and the information provided. Sometimes, clients share in making a decision based on their feelings or thoughts; however, feelings change, and thoughts are not facts. A pause can help you reflect on your feelings, thoughts, and behaviours before making a decision. It enables you to check in with yourself and to base your decision on what aligns best with you. In counselling, some clients feel worried about making the wrong decision, and we unpack this worry together.
How to Design a Calming Environment That Encourages Intentional Pauses
Your living space and work environment can impact your ability to pause. Here are a few suggestions for creating a calming environment.
- Sound
Some individuals find certain sounds or music soothing, and they find it helps relax their nervous system. During your intentional pause, you can listen to your playlist or play an instrument and check in with your feelings.
- Smell
A scent or familiar smell may help relax your nervous system and ground you in the present moment. It can help shift your thoughts and feelings. It can also help you pause and focus on the body sensations you experience from that smell.
- Sight
Focusing on photos or images can help you relax your nervous system. It can help you think about times you enjoyed and experiences you engaged in that you are proud of. Natural daylight can also help you pause, ground yourself in the present moment, and shift your mindset.
- Touch
Some clients find fidgets or the touch of certain materials soothing. It helps them feel calm and grounded. For example, you may have a blanket or a piece of clothing that helps you think about an experience and intentionally pause.
- Taste
Some clients find the taste of their favourite beverage, snack, or meal soothing. They feel calm and more present. Focusing on the taste or texture helps them shift their thinking and take a moment to pause.
- Devices
Some individuals work from home and answer emails or messages during lunch or after work. Taking a break from your device and removing yourself from your workspace can help you pause, slow down, and reflect.
Why Choose At Ease Counseling for support with the power of pause and self-care for true healing?
- Client-driven approach
At Ease Counselling sessions focus on meeting you where you are and working at your pace alongside you with compassion, kindness, and curiosity in Burnaby and online.
- Evidence-based modalities
At Ease Counselling services, I incorporate evidence-based modalities in every session. I am trained in various evidence-based modalities, including Acceptance Commitment Therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. Each of these modalities equips me to support your unique needs, and we work together to achieve your counselling goals.
- Anti-oppressive practice
At Ease Counselling understands the impact of inequality and oppression when supporting you in a safe, non-judgmental, inclusive space in Burnaby and online. People from all ethnic backgrounds, genders, and sexual orientations, including 2SLGBTQI+, are welcome.
