Individual counselling in Burnaby

Childhood Abuse Counselling in Burnaby

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Burnaby Childhood abuse counselling

Starting counselling for childhood abuse is similar to driving.  Like driving different vehicles, it may take time to determine which counselling modality is the best fit for you in sessions. I sit next to you in the passenger seat and ensure you are safe, heard, validated, and supported as you drive. In counselling, we unpack your childhood abuse and how it impacts you. We discuss your coping mechanisms, and I share strategies to help heal your inner child. Some sessions may involve driving in difficult terrain as you share upsetting and painful experiences from your childhood. But you are not alone; we process these experiences as we move forward together. You can pull over, slow down, or change lanes at any time. You gain new insight and understanding, which creates new experiences and awareness. Driving home after your counselling session, you feel validated, supported, reassured, and more resilient. You also reflect on your inner child and meet their needs.

Counselling for childhood abuse. Girl with stuffed animal
Counselling for childhood abuse. Girl with stuffed animal

Hi, my name is Leena Mehta, and I am a registered clinical counsellor in Burnaby (#19428). I’ve worked as a counsellor for over eight years, and during this time, I’ve supported survivors of childhood abuse. You are not to blame for the abuse you experienced. I’ve supported survivors of childhood abuse from all walks of life: professionals, university students, middle-aged women, youth and seniors. The one thing all of these people have in common is that part of them felt like they were responsible for the abuse they experienced. This results in some survivors feeling shame or feeling bad about themselves. Let me help process these feelings. 

I am a Burnaby therapist who supports you in healing from your childhood abuse. This happens in a safe, non-judgmental, and private space, both in person and online. You were born worthy. For some survivors of childhood abuse, their self-esteem, view of self, and self-worth are impacted.  Others have negative core beliefs which surface when they feel triggered in their present day. I work with you to build your self-esteem and self-worth and to strengthen your relationship with yourself. 

Tired of feeling bad about yourself? You are more than the childhood abuse you experienced. What if I told you that your self-talk could be kinder, more patient, and more understanding, rather than harsh and critical? Let’s work together and change your self-talk. 

What is child abuse?

Child abuse includes physical, emotional, financial, sexual, and psychological forms of abuse experienced by a child (under the age of eighteen) by a parent, caregiver or another adult. Moreover, it includes neglect, in which a child’s basic needs are not met. Finally, exposure to family or domestic violence is also deemed child abuse.

Understanding childhood abuse

At Ease Counselling in Burnaby, I work with you to help you achieve your goals and improve your mental health. Reaching out for support is a sign of strength. Believe me, I know it is not easy, but I’m here to support you every step of the way if you let me. 

You may be a busy, successful professional who struggles to heal from the childhood abuse you experienced. At work, you may seem to have everything under control, and coworkers may admire your dedication and drive. However, internally, you may have days when you feel triggered and trapped by the childhood abuse you experienced. What if I told you that you are not the only one in your team who experienced childhood abuse? 

You may be a high-achieving student who struggles to cope with the childhood abuse you experienced. At school, your peers and friends admire your ability to study and deliver coursework and presentations on time. However, internally, you may struggle with a lack of sleep and flashbacks of the childhood abuse you experienced. What if I told you that other students in your class don’t feel safe at home?

You may be a stay-at-home parent or caregiver who struggles to process the childhood abuse you experienced. At home, you may have everything under control and consistently meet your partner’s and children’s needs. However, internally, you may struggle with negative core beliefs which stem from the childhood abuse you experienced. What if I told you that other parents struggle with negative core beliefs?

At Ease Counselling in Burnaby provides a safe space to share your experiences. You share what you feel comfortable with. You can email me or bring in notes if that’s easier. There is no one way or right way to do therapy. What’s most important for me, as your counsellor, is that you feel comfortable and you do what feels right for you.

How does the childhood abuse you experienced impact your life?

There is nothing ‘wrong’ with you. You are not broken, and I’m not here to fix you. As your counsellor in Burnaby, I’m curious to learn about your triggers and your negative core beliefs. 

You are good enough despite the childhood abuse you experienced. You are worthy of love and deserving. Let’s work together to strengthen this.

Childhood abuse can impact your life in several ways. For example:

Your self-esteem, self-worth, and self-confidence.

Childhood abuse results in feelings of shame, and part of you blames yourself for what happened, even though you are not to blame.

Your attachment style, needs, and fears impact your relationship with your partner.

You struggle to validate your feelings and, as a result, seek external validation.

When you feel triggered, core negative beliefs surface, such as feeling unlovable.

How can Burnaby childhood abuse counselling help?

As your Burnaby BIPOC counsellor, I ensure you feel seen, heard, validated, and accepted. Starting your healing journey takes courage, and I am here to support you every step of the way. You are not alone. Let’s talk. 

Burnaby childhood abuse counselling provides a nonjudgmental, kind, and compassionate space to help you heal from the childhood abuse you experienced. Together, we focus on your needs, which may include the following:

Building your self-worth and self-esteem, which includes prioritising your needs and wants.

Understanding and accepting that you are not to blame for the abuse you experienced.

Challenging negative core beliefs and fears which may stem from your childhood or upbringing.

Establishing healthy personal and professional boundaries.

Burnaby childhood abuse counselling modalities that can help

I need your help in determining which counselling modality is best for you. It’s okay if you don’t know. I use a variety of different counselling modalities to support clients with childhood abuse. Every client is different, and as a counsellor, I support each client with where they are in their healing journey.  Counselling modalities that can help include:

Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT)

CBT can help individuals identify and challenge negative thought patterns. It can also help individuals challenge thinking traps.

Dialectical behavioural therapy (DBT)

DBT can help individuals with emotional regulation by learning skills to help them cope. It can also help individuals learn strategies to help them cope with distress tolerance.

Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EDMR)

EMDR can help individuals process traumatic and distressing experiences through bilateral stimulation. Different to traditional talk therapy, EMDR involves processing each distressing experience until it is no longer distressing.

Resources

You may not be ready to start therapy, but you can still access resources:

310 Mental Health Support Line (province-wide) Crisis 24 hours: 310-6789

Kids Help Phone:  1-800-668-6868 or Text the word “CONNECT” to 686868.

National Child Abuse Hotline 1-800-422-4453

Suicide Crisis Helpline: 9-8-8 24/7 for calls and text

Websites 

https://bc.cmha.ca/ 

https://endingviolencecanada.org/sexual-assault-centres-crisis-lines-and-support-services/ 

https://www.heretohelp.bc.ca/ 

https://keltymentalhealth.ca/

Benefits of Burnaby childhood abuse counselling

Connection

Burnaby childhood abuse counselling focuses on the connection between childhood trauma and your present struggles or places where you feel stuck. For example, you may have an anxious attachment that impacts your relationship, and this may stem from your childhood and the emotional abuse you experienced. In counselling, we work together to understand how your anxiety comes to the surface, and we focus on your attachment needs and fears. Some adult survivors of childhood abuse struggle with low self-esteem and negative self-talk as part of them internalised their perpetrator’s voice. As your Burnaby therapist, I work with you to build your self-esteem, strengthen your connection with yourself and develop a kinder self-talk. Finally, some adult survivors feel disconnected from their inner child, and we unpack this in counselling.

Explore

Burnaby childhood abuse counselling explores how your childhood abuse impacts your life. We explore how it impacts your thoughts, feelings, behaviours, view of self, and relationships with others. We also identify triggers and how you react or respond when triggered. Individuals who have experienced childhood abuse sometimes blame themselves and have negative self-talk. Childhood abuse survivors also sometimes feel ashamed, and they struggle to share their experiences as they fear being judged or blamed. As your counsellor in Burnaby, I support you in unpacking and processing this shame. I also reassure adult survivors that they are not to blame for the abuse they experienced. Some adult survivors of childhood abuse experience grief and loss around their childhood. We process this loss and work together to rebuild confidence and self-worth.

Heal

Burnaby childhood abuse counselling helps you heal from the childhood abuse you experienced. You may struggle with feelings of shame, embarrassment, blame, and confusion. Some adult survivors of childhood abuse had coping mechanisms, but these may no longer be effective.  You may find it challenging to keep up with work, socialise with friends or family, and engage in day-to-day activities without feeling triggered. As your Burnaby therapist, we work together to unpack past experiences and heal them so they no longer trigger you. We can not change what happened, but we can change how you feel about it. We also work together to heal your inner child; we identify their unmet needs, wants and fears. Some of our work together involves validating your inner child’s feelings and meeting their unmet needs.

FAQ

Are strangers responsible for the majority of childhood abuse?

In some cases, survivors of childhood abuse report that the perpetrators were strangers, but in the majority of cases, the perpetrator is someone the survivor knows, for example, a parent, caregiver, family member or trusted adult. What if I told you the perpetrator knew what they were doing when they exerted power and control over you?

Is the survivor ever responsible for childhood abuse?

No, they are not. The survivor is never to blame for being physically, verbally, emotionally or sexually abused. It doesn’t matter what the survivor said or did. No one asks to be abused physically, emotionally, verbally or sexually by their parents, family members or adults. The perpetrator is to blame and responsible for their actions. As your counsellor in Burnaby, I help survivors process and unpack feelings of shame, blame, anger, sadness and guilt. What if you processed your feelings so you no longer felt shame or anger towards yourself when you think about the childhood abuse you experienced?

Is it possible to heal from childhood abuse?

Yes, it is possible to heal from childhood abuse. Every client has a unique healing journey, and while sometimes it takes time to process and recover, it is possible to heal. Counselling in Burnaby supports individuals who want to process and heal from childhood abuse. As a Burnaby therapist, I have supported several clients on their healing journeys. What if I told you that you can do hard things?

Why are some people abusive?

Perpetrators of childhood abuse justify their behaviour and often blame the child for their actions; however, survivors are not to blame. As a Burnaby BIPOC therapist, I believe that no reason could explain why someone is abusive to a child. Some research shows that perpetrators who were abused as children grew up to be perpetrators. However, not everyone who was abused as a child grows up to be a perpetrator.

What does a perpetrator look like?

There is no “type” and often perpetrators are friendly, trustworthy and known to the child. Their behaviour may not be concerning to others, and others may also view them as friendly and kind; however, they abused you when no one was around. Some adult survivors disclose being abused by their child minder or neighbour. In these instances, the perpetrator was older and known in the community. At Ease Counselling in Burnaby supports survivors in unpacking and processing their abuse.

Why Choose At Ease Counselling?

Client-driven approach

As a Burnaby BIPOC counsellor, sessions focus on meeting you where you are and working at your pace, alongside you, with compassion, kindness, and curiosity, both in-person and online.

Evidence-based modalities

As a Burnaby therapist, I incorporate evidence-based modalities in every session. I am trained in various evidence-based modalities, including Acceptance Commitment Therapy, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy, Dialectical Behavioural Therapy, and Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing. Each of these modalities equips me to support your unique needs, and we work together to achieve your counselling goals.

Anti-oppressive practice

As a Burnaby therapist, I understand the impact of inequality and oppression, providing a safe, non-judgmental, and inclusive space in-person and online. People from all ethnic backgrounds, genders, and sexual orientations, including 2SLGBTQ+, are welcome. As a South Asian Burnaby therapist, I create a culturally sensitive space, and I am curious to learn more about your culture, norms, and values.